Reflecting on 21 Centuries of Faith

Where Have All the Father’s Gone…

Georges de La Tour: St. Joseph the Carpenter

Pete Seeger in his 1961 hit, Where Have All the Flowers Gone, ponders the loss of innocence and laments our lack of reflection to learn from our mistakes.  He could replace one of the verses to ask the question, “Where have all the Fathers gone?”

Long time past are the times of Father Knows Best, Leave it to Beaver, and the Andy Griffith Show. Instead, we have been left with Two and Half Men, the George Lopez Show and Modern Family (nothing modern about it – this is a recasting of an older drama called Sodom and Gomorrah). These shows are otherwise known as the wimp, the idiot and the lesbian.  Society has emasculated its men and now suffers the consequences.  Adam fails in the garden and suddenly there is no need for husbands and fathers.

On the contrary, research empirically shows that fathers have a major influence in the formation of their children – especially faith formation.  The Swiss government in 1994 (published in 2000) commissioned a study to examine the effects of parental participation on the religious practices of their children.  Startling but not surprising, the report showed:

  1. If both father and mother attended church regularly then 33 per cent of their children became regular churchgoers, a further 41 per cent irregular attenders and about a quarter not practicing at all.
  2. If the mother was a regular church attender but the father irregular then only 3 per cent of their children became regular church attenders, 59 per cent irregular attenders and 38 per cent non-attenders.
  3. If the father was non-practicing and the mother regular only 2 per cent of children were regular and 37 per cent irregular church attenders. 61 per cent did not attend church at all.
  4. Surprisingly, if the father is a regular church attender the childrens’ religious practice varied in an inverse relationship to their mothers’ practice. If the mother was regular 33 per cent of children were regular. If she was an irregular attender then 38 per cent of children were regular. If the mother was non-practicing then 44 per cent of children became regular attenders.
  5. Even when the father is an irregular attender and the mother non- practicing 25 per cent of the children were regular attenders and 23 per cent irregular attenders.

Even the research shows us we need our fathers.  Someone needs to start a revolution around fatherhood. If women want their equal rights and to be treated with respect they should invest in raising virtuous sons.  Not submissive sons without backbone but ones that will rise up and give their life for a stranger at a moments notice. I do not care what the feminists say, I have never met a woman who did not want or need a knight to defend her honor and treat her the way God intended. Yes ladies, you were meant to have the men treat you like the crown jewel of creation that you are. The fact is, the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.

To this end, you need the father’s involvement.  He needs to model the virtuous warrior-lover that he was designed to be.  DO NOT stop the boys (dads are included as one of the boys) from wrestling and playing those games you consider horrible because there is so much talk about death and there are bruises.  Did you ever notice that when little boys play they die an excruciating death while saving the girl or fellow soldiers at the very last minute.  They are wired to take the bullet and keep walking.  They them become who they are – with all their rough-housing and sensitivity it is the father who knows how to bend and shape their will while the mother ensures it is never broken.

Until this happens, I ask you, why do we support these shows that aren’t fun?  Integrity means that our beliefs conform with our practices internally and externally.  In other words, if you are laughing at these programs that are offensive to our Lord then can you really say that you are allowing the Christ to rule your life. Most youth and young adults quickly retort to me that giving these past times up would mean they have no more entertainment and surely our Lord would not want that. I believe the cross says different.

Do not conform yourselves to this age but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and pleasing and perfect. (Rm. 12:2)

Note that the three philosophical goods (good, pleasing, and perfect) are a package deal. I am not encouraging you to throw out the t.v. or never go to the movies (although…) but why support those very things that undermine our society.

Anyway, today is Father’s day.  There is much to celebrate and much to pray for.  Ladies, do you want good husbands and strong fathers? Don’t do his job for him. Encourage him and tell him he is really up for the task and you want him not repeat Adam’s mistake. Be patient with him, he has been told all his life that he is to sit quietly and say “Yes dear, whatever you want dear.” Marry a knight from the get-go.  If you think he will change or you can change him, please go to the local hospital and take a drug test. It’s possible but improbable. Marry someone who cultivates the virtues, especially honor, obedience, simplicity, modesty, purity, humility, kindness, courage and assertiveness. Then commend him over to St. Joseph and St. Michael.  What St. Joseph cannot encourage him to do, St. Michael will use his version of angelic warrior “encouragement” to get the job done.

To you my fellow fathers and brothers…WAKE UP and take back the culture for your wife and children!

Where have all the fathers gone?
Long time passing
Where have all the fathers gone?
Long time ago
Where have all the father gone?
Society has crushed them every one
When will we ever learn?
When will we ever learn?

One Response to Where Have All the Father’s Gone…

  1. Karidnal says:

    A number of excellent points here, Marques. The stats are especially illustrative. Good advice for both men and women in this culture. I’ll take it to heart.

Leave a reply